


Arya's Nightmares

by orphan_account



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Arya Stark & Jon Snow - Freeform, Arya Stark & Robb Stark - Freeform, Asexual Arya Stark, Backround Jon and Robb, Closeted Character, Dreams, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Incest, Love Confessions, M/M, Sibling Incest, Sister-Sister Relationship, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-20 21:06:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17629682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Arya is in love with her sister, but it eats her up. The nightmares come every night, and she cant stop thinking about them, slowly tainting her life. But she cant confess, cant confide in anyone, and wakes up every morning with one wish: She wants to die.





	1. Secrets Unveiled

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ProjectClesker](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProjectClesker/gifts).



> First incest fanfiction.. dang it took Game of Fukin Thrones to get that to happen. What is wrong with me?!

Arya Stark was in love.  
Love was a loose term to her though, and she never expected it to develop in its entirety. She had figured out quite easily that she was not sexually attracted to anyone, least of all girls of the same sex. It was frightening, to know such a thing. She wasnt normal, and that fact alone was what drove her to near insanity. But it was the dreams, or rather, the nightmares that stunted her happiness like a gate.  
She awoke stiffly, her intentions of smiling as she rose all but forgotten. New Years resolutions be damned, happiness was a virtue. Her mind rippled with last night's dream and she cupped her hand over her lips to stifle a grimace. It made her heart throb painfully, thrumming with anxiety and panic. If only her sister was not her sister, if only she had been someone else.  
The dream was quick, a mere snippet of the length of what they normally were. But it was darker, placid and holding within itself the coils of hatred and fear. It sparked inside her like a flame every moment she fought to remember yet forget. It started simple, just a casual walk back to her room, that was until she heard the sobs, the shrieks. The wails of pain and pleads.  
The sounds were coming from Sansa's room, heavy, vivid breathing that Arya couldn't mistake. It sounded like that of the scenes in movies her parents had let her watch and later regretted. It stilled her blood, making her senses light with a fear and loathing she could not suppress.  
She lightly pressed her ear to the door, afraid but knowing in earnest what was happening. Ramsay. He was cruel, vicing, and worst of all, dating her sister. Arya knew he was trouble from the moment she saw his hobbit-crude face, and still to this day feared and despised the man. He may have been young, passably good looking, but nothing of that could still her anger when Arya found out about Sansa and Ramsay dating.  
And now it was coming to a head.  
Arya slammed the door open, standing with wide eyes and parted lips. Ramsay loomed over the bed, his face twisted in a smirk, eyes lidded with malice. He was bare, all except for a torn shirt, which looked to have the grooves of fingers strewn across.  
And a second later Arya knew why. Sansa had her fingers knotted in his shirt sleeves, pale face strung with ropes of tears that pooled at her neck. Her eyes were puffy and her lips caught in a scream as his hips rocked. She was writhing, almost animalistically, squirming under his arms as. Her cries of pain echoed in Arya's mind, her thoughts now dripping with hatred and a sheer and desolate hopelessness. "Get away from her!", she shouted, standing up taller, narrowing her eyes.  
It all felt so real.  
Sansa's reddened eyes caught her own, so full of fear and practically begging. It made Arya's heart sink. Ramsay smirked, almost hellishly as if he were completely unfazed, perhaps he was. "Begone girl", he groaned out, grinding his hips earning a strangled yelp.  
Arya froze, unable to move. She hated herself for just standing there, but she felt like she was drowning, sinking into a barren wasteland of hopeless morose. But then, as if wished upon her by a god, Ramsay was over her, leaning his face to meet her, nose to gnarled nose. "She will love me much more than she would ever love her own sister", he spite, rough skin contorting into an amused chuckle.  
The younger girl felt her stomach clench. He wasn't wrong, and she dared not believe otherwise.  
Arya skulked down to the kitchen, sighing. It was a Friday, thank the gods, but it still made her sad. Another weekend she would see Sansa, perhaps with her boyfriend or even with her friends who she was far closer to than her own sister.  
The kitchen table was abuzz, as it was most morning. Rickon and Bran were feisty as usual, fighting and squabbling like barn hens. It made a small smile creep to the corner of her lips, but quickly died when she saw Sansa leaning back in her chair, fingers flitting about her phone as if it were the most beautiful thing in the world.  
"You ok Arya?", Arya nearly jumped, feeling the surreal presence of her step-brother behind her. She turned to see the familiar, rugged form of Jon. He was by far her favorite sibling, except Sansa, and he was a rock like shoulder to cry on. He was the first person she confided in when it came to her own non-sexual personality. It had set a tone for them, a loving embrace of a relationship she held onto and cherished.  
But as such, he knew when she was upset. Normally she could hide it, smiling and laughing like herself, making snide remarks and sniggers. But not today, not after her nightmare. She nodded meekly to him, earning a pursed frown. He rested his broad hand on her smaller shoulder, watching her with a curious yet worried glint. "You sure? I don't like seeing you upset."  
Arya sighed heavily, plopping down in her chair next to him. No one else seemed to be paying attention, except Robb who was eyeing Jon with a strange emotion she didn't recognize. It was almost primitive, but in a comfortable, familiar way. She ignored him, turning to Jon and shoving on a smile of normalcy.  
"You have been acting a little weird lately", Jon said, poking his plate with an absentminded apathy. "But we all do sometimes. You on the other hand, are too strong to be beaten down. So, whats up?"  
His sister paled, fingers tingling. For a knee jerk moment, she thought she might actually tell him. Confess to everything she felt, everything she loathed and wanted. But she quickly persuaded herself out of it, stifling the moan of displeasure her heart murmured. "I can act weird. I didn't get too much sleep, I'm fine."  
Jon frowned again, so familiar, his grimace. It made her sad, seeing her brother effected by her this way.  
But he didn't bring it up again, respecting her boundaries. A part of her wished he didn't.

It was during lunch that Arya first felt the larger stabs of jealousy. She was watching from her table, with her friends, Sandor and Gendry. Of course she was a boy person, not seeing them in any romantic way at all. Luckily, they didn't push her on the matter, accepting what she was acting with open, forgiving arms.  
She could not take her eyes off her gorgeous sister who was sitting next to Ramsay, because of course she was. Just the sight of him made her guts knot painfully, and she crossed her legs, digging her nails into her palms. Now that the oh so vivid dream was in her mind, seeing him in any other way was near impossible.  
But it was only when he pulled her into a rough kiss, hands trailing up her sides and across her chest, that made Arya's mouth run dry. A bitterness flooded her chest and she scowled, jealousy and turmoil boiling within her chest. She wanted to cry, seeing how roughly he handled the girl, as if she was not delicate. Not a treasure to be grateful for. Just some token girl.  
"You all right?", Gendry asked, sounding so much like her brother it startled her. She tore her eyes away from the provocative act across the room, grateful for the distraction.  
"Yes I'm fine."  
"Liar", Sandor cut in. "Whats bothering you?"  
"Why can anyone not leave me alone?! So what if I act weird, I can act weird if I want! Just drop it", she hissed childishly, her normally sure footed jerkiness fleeing her in those moments. Her friends looked at her with dismay and unguarded concern, which only fueled her anger.

Later that night, Arya was in her room, listening to the faint voices below.  
"Are you sure?", Catelyn, her mother, pressed. Ned was undoubtedly opening and closing his mouth, unable to formulate words. "How could they?", she seethed, anger rotting her tongue.  
There was a shuffling. "Relax, please", Ned said tentatively. "We will get it sorted out. But it is their choice, who are we to judge?"  
"Because they are brothers!", came the shrill reply. "Half brothers. That bastard is going to ruin Robb's life! Cant you see that?!"  
Ned sighed heavily. "I promise you, we will sort this out. But have you considered that they may actually be in.."  
"Don't", Catelyn warned. "This is your fault anyway. Robb would be perfectly fine if you had not gone out and fucked that whore."  
The man could be heard, radiating a bristling resentment. Arya turned away, clutching her knees tightly to her chest. Jon and Robb.  
It struck her hard, but not with disgust. Rather, pride and envy. She knew something was burning between them, alight whenever they met eyes. And if they were in love, like her father said, she had no right to take that from them, no matter if they were half brothers or not. But she also knew that her mother would never approve, which only further darkened her mood. It would never work out with Sansa, even if the girl did reciprocate her feelings, which she didn't.  
Arya sighed, sitting up and leaving the soft confined of her dark room. She trekked down the halls, tedious of the straining boards and trying to keep quiet. Her mother and father thought she was asleep. But when they had found out about Robb and Jon, from a not so subtle moaning from Robb's room, the house was blazing with anger and worry.  
She met the door she was looking for quickly. Robb. She didn't doubt that he was awake, after all, who could be in his situation?  
She knocked, trying to keep her nerves steady. But they ebbed and sizzled, turning her skin into a hot mass that coated her body. She shifted uncomfortably, waiting for an awfully long time before the door creaked open.  
Robb looked out at her with a sullen, tired face. Gray bags marred his skin under the eyes, his lips slightly parted and back hunched precariously. She didn't dare push it, knowing this was not the time to vex him like she normally enjoyed. She wanted to help him, because maybe if she did, she would feel better about herself and her own feelings.  
"Arya", he said sadly. The sadness was not for her however, but for what had happened. For what was to come.  
Jon had left soon enough, going off to find Ygritte, his friend. He needed to confide with solace, and Robb, for once, was unavailable, under house arrest. "Robb", she started awkwardly, not knowing what to say. So instead, she entered and wrapped her small arms around his chest.  
He stiffened for a moment, shutting the door and wrapping his arms around her in turn, pulling her close. He started to tremble slightly, and her eyes stung. He was crying. Her Robb, her rock. Her strong big brother was crying. She felt as if the world was caving in around her, swallowing her whole as it snickered and jeered.  
"I'm so sorry", she murmured, burying her face in his collarbone. "I wish mother accepted it."  
He looked down at her, and she saw the faint glisten of tear tracks spreading across his cheeks. It looked so foreign on him, denying his strength and authority. She hated it, seeing weakness that mirrored how she felt. "Are you not disgusted?"  
She shook her head, letting out a breath and relaxing her shoulders. "No. You are both my brothers, and I love you. If you love each other, even if it is more than as brothers, then I will respect it and support you. That's what siblings do right?", she forced a smile. "I really am sorry."  
He nodded, pursing his lips before collapsing on his bed. "Im guessing you want to know what happened?", His voice did not hold resentment for her obvious curiosity, but instead with a passion, a love.  
"You don't have to-"  
"We got involved six months ago", he started, leaning back against his headboard which rocked against the wall. "It started out with a bit of interest, from both of us.. but.. it turned into something else", he paused. Arya took the moment of silence to spread herself next to him, leaning close enough to feel his shallow breaths against her face.  
"I knew mother wouldn't react well. I was planning on telling her, just not now. But I couldn't stop myself", his voice became choked with emotion, and Arya hugged him tightly, squeezing against his side until he regained his composure. "She caught us in the worst way possible, all because of me. And now Jon's gone."  
Arya sniffled slightly. She was afraid, the fear creeping into her mind and showing through the whites of her eyes. She clung to her brother tighter, trying to ground herself from her whirring thoughts. "It will all work out", she promised, knowing she would do everything in her power to keep it.  
Robb shook his head. "You shouldn't get involved. Mother is angry enough as it is, what do you think she would do when she found out im turning her own daughter against her?", he smiled softly.  
She snorted. "Like she could stop me. Besides, she has no right to tell you who you can love", she didn't even believe her own words though.

Jon returned early in the morning, leaving Arya and Robb to wait up on him. It was slow going, Arya slowly ushering her brother into a better mood by turning on his TV and watching a dumb show called Game Of Thrones; he seemed to enjoy it more than her, for which she was thankful.  
When Jon opened the door, with Catelyn and Ned passed out in the living room, too angry to sleep in their own rooms, he crept up to Robb's room. Arya heard the floor boards creaking; he never was too good at sneaking around.  
The door cracked open and he smiled sadly. Arya was curled into her brother's chest, lifting slowly with the rise and fall of his breath. She had finally coaxed him into an uneasy sleep, but returned Jon's greeting. "I'm sorry", he whispered, leaning against the door after shutting it behind him.  
She shook her head quickly. "You have nothing to be sorry for. But mum does."

Arya left soon after, looking back and seeing Jon and Robb curl up, so normal. It hurt her deep down, seeing how easily they cold cuddle in each others arms. While with her, the closest she came to doing that with her love, was in dreams.  
She hunched her shoulders, quiet again as she went back to her room.  
"Arya?"  
Arya turned to see Sansa standing in her doorway, looking tired and rubbing her eyes. Arya's heart sped up painfully, and her cheeks heated. She shoved down her emotions, allowing them to pool in her gut like a hive of festering maggots. "Did I wake you?", the younger asked.  
Sansa shook her head. "What happened last night?"  
Seeing Sansa so vulnerable, Arya felt intrusive. Again she chastised herself for her own feelings, trying as hard as she could not to let her wishes show. She had become quite good at it though, to all except her friends and Jon. "Did you hear about Robb and Jon..?"  
The older girl yawned before nodding slowly. "Yes. Its weird don't you think?"  
Arya's heart plummeted into her stomach and she swallowed the lump in her throat, forcing the cry down in her throat. "I don't actually. If they love each other then they love each other. There's nothing we can do about it."  
Sansa curled her lip. "I don't know, I guess you are right. I just don't know how it happened", she chuckled uneasily. "How did they fall in love with each other? They are brothers for crying out loud!"  
The younger girl's lips trembled slightly, and she hoped that in the darkened hallway it didn't show. "I don't know. Love is like a virus, it thrives in the worst conditions and festers within the best."  
"True", Sansa paused. "Did you talk to them?"  
Arya nodded. "I did, and I don't think what they did was wrong."  
"Me either, I'm just shocked is all", Sansa said, nearly in dismissal. But behind those icy eyes, Arya saw the confusion and darting worry that surrounded her like a fog. This family was crumbling ever so slowly, but Arya couldn't focus, turning on her heal and jumping into her own bed.  
She burrowed under the covers, wrapping them around her, bundling her tight. If she wrapped them around her enough, then maybe the pain would go away. Maybe the feelings would cease and she could have a normal life, in a normal family. A family where Sansa was not her sister and loved her back.  
Foolish idiot.

Two days later, Catelyn left. She slammed the door, treading out into the early winter snow and driving away. The siblings all watched with aroused strain, hating to see this. Most of all Robb and Jon. Ned was beside himself, not mad per say, but trapped between a sour depression and a fiery heat. He could not be happy with the two love-bitten brothers, in any case. Arya worried for them, more than her poor mind could handle at the moment.  
It was a Monday, which meant school. But Arya refused to go, along with Robb and Jon. Ned didn't protest, knowing they were all doing great in regards to grades. He himself didn't go into work, and no one bothered to go out of their way to talk to each other.  
Arya was napping, a fizzy sleep that was shallow, a kind of lucid state. It was midday, a rush of clouds splintering the sun, mirroring the bleakness inside the house. Sansa was at school, for which Arya was thankful. But it wouldn't last forever. But she knew one thing for sure: Sansa was NOT ok with this kind of relationship.  
Night had fallen when she awake, and she was overjoyed when she found out that no dreams had tainted her sleep. She could hear Theon coming home from work, not speaking as he went up to Robb's room. The atmosphere in the house was sickening and cruel, making her want to leave, to run, to seek comfort and someone's arms to hold her.  
"Sansa", she whispered, sighing as she shut her eyes. Sleep had long since evaded her however, and she sat up. 

The next week or so was full of no surprises. In Wednesday, Catelyn returned, with a forced and tout smile. It made her all the more menacing, and she swore, as the nights wore on, that she heard Jon and Robb whispering to each other. Her heart ached for Sansa, for the things that would never happen.  
That night came a repeat of her worst nightmare involving Sansa, except this time it was different. Ramsay was smirking, but this time he had a blade. It glinted and flashed, and all Arya could do was hopelessly watch. She had never been afraid of blood, but as skin was being flayed with brute sadism, she wanted to vomit. Sansa screamed and shrieked, begging and pleading to Arya to make it stop, as if it were her fault.  
Arya awoke in a cold sweat, breathing hard. The sheets stuck to her damp skin and she rolled away from them, sitting on her pillow and she buried her head in her knees. It hurt, everything hurt. Her nightmares hurt, but it was the life of it that stung even more.  
She rocked back and forth, trying to calm her jumping blood, stilling it and pushing it down. She sobbed, the thoughts of the dream flitting around her mind like a swarm of bees. "Please, make it stop", she whispered. Her tears ran down her cheeks, reminding her of the shrivled reality.  
A knock shifted her attention. Someone was at her door. She wrapped her sheets around herself, wiping her eyes vigorously. She thought about pretending to be asleep, then thought better of it. She couldn't act, not now. Her breaths were too uneven, too shallow. Too much.  
"Arya?", the voice was soft, familiar.  
Arya's breath hitched further as more tears sprang to her eyes.  
Please not Sansa.. Shit.


	2. Please Dont..

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arya continues to seclude herself from those she loves.

Arya was struck with fear. Sansa had heard her.  
She curled further in on herself as the door opened and the lights were flicked on. She wilted like a flower, trying to hide her face in a pillow.  
But the bed dipped with weight and a soft hand was resting on her shoulder. Arya stiffened, squirming slightly under her sister's loving touch. "Arya", she said again, this time rubbing Arya's arm up and down. If there was one thing Sansa was good at, it was being kind when the need be. Sure she could be a pain in the ass, but she was always there, always a shoulder to cry on. And while some people used her for it, like Joffrey, she never stopped.  
Arya shivered slightly, feeling her bones quaking in fear. She turned slightly, looking at her older sister. She was hyper aware of tear tracks that still crested her skin, denying any chance that she was in fact, composed. Sansa knitted her brows, pursing her lips.  
It was late in the night, and why Sansa was up Arya couldn't guess. But she felt warmth radiating from the girl's touch, and involuntarily leaned into it, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. The dream was fading, like all the rest, but she was afraid to close her eyes even still. To do that would be to fall back into death's loving claws.  
"Whats wrong?", Sansa asked, continuing to rub Arya's arm, not knowing the effect she had on the younger girl.   
"Nothing", Arya said, though her lip trembled and her words tumbled out as if pulled from her teeth.   
"Liar", Sansa said softly, frowning. She looked down at Arya, brushing a stray strand of dark hair away from Arya's eyes. The girl let out a shaky breath, pursing her lips to hide her chattering teeth. She missed the days when Sansa's touch didn't send her spiraling into a pit of pulsating nerves. "Is it about Robb and Jon?"  
Arya shook her head miserably, unable to utter much of a word. Her mouth went dry, her body tense. She forced herself to relax as to not give her feelings away. It wasn't like she wanted to seduce her sister, and again was distraught with the fact that Ramsay would do such a thing. But he hadn't, it was only a dream.  
No. He hadn't. Yet.  
"Arya its ok, you can tell me", Sansa smiled in encouragement. It only further stilled Arya's blood, making her squirm with discomfort. No. She couldn't tell Sansa. Not now. Not ever. It wouldn't do either of them any good, and she didn't want to face the rejection, let alone lose her sister completely.  
"Its nothing", Arya repeated, her voice slightly more firm.  
"Its not nothing", Sansa pressed, her hand movements stilling slightly. "You don't cry for no reason. That's not like Arya."  
Arya swallowed. How wrong she was. If only she knew how many nights the younger girl cried herself to sleep, or woke up with tears streaming down her cheeks. "Please just.. forget it."  
"No. Tell me."  
Something snapped within the confused girl, sending her over the edge. She realized too late that it was for the worse. "I said, FORGET IT!", Arya screamed. Her voice trembled and Sansa shot back, her face stricken and hurt. She recoiled, removing her head, lips parted in confusion.  
"Arya ple-"  
"No!", Arya shouted, not caring if she woke anyone up. "Go away! All you ever do is hurt me! So stop! Get away from me! Please", Arya sat up, and pushed her sister. Hard. Sansa stumbled to her feet, her face a mask of pained hurt and confusion, quickly washed away with an evidently fake remorse.   
"Fine", she breathed, standing.  
Arya started to shake, and when Sansa had gone, she sobbed. She sobbed and cried until her head throbbed and her throat burned. And even then, when the tears refused to come, she curled into herself, the nightmares returning in full force.   
"Please, let me die."

The next morning, after earning a complete and utter ignoring from Sansa, Arya locked eyes with Jon. His face was pale, as it often was around Catelyn. But right now it was with more concern for his sister than his own life.  
He ushered her over and she didn't bother to resist. She felt empty, glancing at Sansa who was back to her normal self, though slightly shaken. She was walking more stiff than usual, her movements a burden rather than a normalcy. "Arya, what happened last night? Everyone heard you scream."  
Arya bit her lip, sighing hoarsely. "I cant do it anymore", she whispered before collapsing into his arms.  
He led them to the couch, plopping down and cradling the smaller girl in his arms. She wasn't crying, just shaking, knotting her fists into his shirt. She shook her head. "Please..", she whispered, again and again, her fragmented sentences only furthering Jon's concern.  
Finally, she pulled away, sitting back and sniffling. "Arya", Jon said, resting a tentative hand on her shoulder. "Whats going on with my perfect sister?"  
"I-", she knew this was it. She had to tell someone. She couldn't suffer alone, at least, not like this. She was a Stark, a pack animal. Not a lone wolf. She needed her family, her pack. And at the moment, all she had was Jon, and his oh so similar story. "I don't know what to do.."  
"About what?", Jon kept his voice steady and without a shake to it. She admired him for being stoic, but in the process, she also felt smaller. A fraction of herself. He paused, his mind working quicker than his heartbeats.   
"I know that look", he whispered. "Do you like someone?"  
The words hit her with an underwhelming severity. They were said so plainly it was as if they meant nothing. 'Like'. It wasn't the term she would use. It was love, it had to be. And yet because of last night, it would stay just that: a broken admiration. "Y-yes", she stuttered.  
He smiled a rare yet enticing grin. It lifted her spirits like a giant's hand, allowing her to gain more footing in the conversation. "Well..", he glanced at her. "I'm guessing you wont tell me out right. So.. boy or girl?"  
After having known about Arya's not so sexual tendencies, he must have assumed she could have been other things too. "Girl", Arya whispered, keeping her voice low so as to not alert her family to their conversation.   
Jon nodded. "Why don't you tell her? I dont like seeing you hurt, and I'm sure she doesn't either."  
Arya shook her head quickly. "I cant tell her. It wouldn't work out. It would only make things worse", she held back another sob. "We can never be together."  
"What makes you so sure?", Jon's voice was sympathetic, so much so she wanted to scream at him the truth. He would understand, so would Robb. They were the only ones who would, and for once, she was thankful for their relationship.   
"Because it just wouldn't work out. Nothing would and..", she trailed off, shaking.  
"And?"  
Arya lowered her voice, the words nearly trembling into thin air like a stray leaf. "Because she is my sister."  
The words were so forceful that she winded herself, the breath in her lungs running away like a rabbit in a field. Her eyes stung with the need to shed more tears, her eyelids feeling as if they were covered in sand grains.   
Jon was quiet for a long moment, impassive and still. Then he pulled Arya into his arms, stroking her hair. "Its ok", he whispered. She pressed herself into him, enveloped in warmth and comfort. "Its all going to be ok."  
"No it wont", Arya mumbled sourly.  
"Yes. It will", he looked down at her with dancing eyes. "I know its hard, but you have to talk to her. You have to. Whether the feelings go away in the end or develop mutually, it doesn't matter. But you have to talk to her", he glanced back at the table where Sansa had her head down, not even pecking at her phone. "She's hurting."  
Arya nodded fearfully, knowing he was right. But she didn't know how to do it, how to move past the gate of dread that lept into her chest. "I'm scared."  
Jon squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. "So was I when I first started to have feelings for Robb, but I soon realized that those same feelings caused me the greatest happiness anyone could ask for. It was more than enough to make up for all the pain. But I had to try, at least."

 

Arya was tentative and ginger with her footing, only stopping to breath. Sansa had returned home from school, looking on with apathy and guarded sadness. Arya felt a sharp stab of regret but heard Jon's voice echo in her head. "But I had to try, at least."  
She calmed herself with a few deep breaths before knocking on Sansa's door.  
At first there was nothing, and she was overly fearful that the elder girl would simply ignore her. But within a few moments, the door creaked open. Sansa looked down at Arya, her hair a mass of flaming tendrils that were bent like wisps of smoke.  
Sansa's eyes danced with more hurt, more manufactured pain that Arya had conjured up. This was all her fault. But taking up a bout of courage, she steadied herself. "Im sorry", she said suddenly, breaking the eerie silence.   
Arya waited for a response but got none. So she did the one thing she knew would help them both, she pulled Sansa into a hug. Sansa stiffened but melted into the embrace, wrapping her arms around Arya who was finally at a rest. Her body fit against her sister's perfectly, and she loved the feel of it. She was enveloped in warmth and comfort, something no one else could replace.  
"I'm sorry", Arya repeated, squeezing Sansa. She said the words over and over to the point where they lost meaning, but she didn't care. All she wanted was her sister, all she wanted was for this moment to last an eternity.   
Finally Sansa pulled away, smiling brightly. "Its ok Arya!", she said happily. "We all have our moments", she frowned for a second. "What was wrong anyway? I can tell it is still bothering you."  
Filled with more confidence, Arya just smiled. And for once in a long while it was genuine. "I cant talk about it. Not yet. Please, it'll get better, someday."  
Sansa looked at her doubtfully, but didn't push. Instead, she pulled Arya over to her bed. The night was drawing near, thanks to Arya's own will to not do what she had set out to do. But she had to admit, she felt much better. The weight on her chest was lessened, bearable, at least for the moment.  
More comfortable, Sansa and Arya sat, watching movies until the clock had ticked down to early morning hours, earning both of them long yawns. Arya stood to leave, energized and smiling again. It felt amazing, she had to admit. Before she could truly find her feet though, Sansa grabbed her wrist.  
Arya turned in confusion. "Can you stay? Its been forever since we slept together you know", she laughed. "Gods I miss it when we were kids."  
The younger girl sighed, her body alight with love and joy. She was in love with her sister, and now she was reminded why. "I do too", she whispered, changing quickly.  
They lay down in the bed, looking at each other and smiling. Arya fought down the urge to kiss the other girl, this new primitive emotion overwhelming and wrong. Without warning, Sansa pulled her sister to her chest, letting out a content breath.  
Arya closed her eyes, leaning into her sister's chest and feeling more at home than she ever had before.

The nightmare was a sudden rush of fear and anxiety, all rolled into a fearful ball of dread. Arya was back in the same room she had visited so many times before, but this time Ramsay was gone. At first she was confused, hearing the wails and screams of Sansa, but not knowing from what. Is Ramsay was gone..  
She looked down.  
Arya was leaning over her sister, her body moving without relent, moving with painful and jagged fluidity. Her fingernails raked across Sansa's bare chest, leaving blistering marks. Sansa cried again, writhing and kicking, trying to free herself.  
Arya could believe what was happening and found herself resisting, panicking. This couldn't be happening, this wasn't  
Sansa's bone chilling cries were enough to bring tears to her own, demented and dark eyes. But she couldn't stop. Her body was not her own, yet somehow she knew it was her; a twisted manged version of her, but her nonetheless. The cries of pain, that sloshed around in her mind like icy sludge and Arya cried.  
Everything was wrong, rancid, putrid.

She awoke, kicking and screaming, eyes snapping open as she sat up, earning a groan from the girl next to her. Arya's eyes were wide as saucers, her lips trembling. Her entire body was floating in an ethereal darkness, grappling at her skin and taking hold from the roots. She cried, more and more tears flooding her thoughts, through her eyes and staining the sheets bellow her.  
She gripped the blankets until her knuckles were white, not even noticing when Sansa had slid up next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling them together. Arya shuddered, unable to move. Her joints locked up, unable to move, just like her dream.  
She had hurt Sansa. She had hurt HER Sansa.  
"Arya, Arya, Arya!", Sansa whisper-yelled, lightly shaking the girl who looked up at her with blurred eyes. "Gods Arya", Sansa whispered, running her hands through Arya's damp hair, stroking all along her back in such a calming way she thought it was motherly.  
"I- Im sorry", Arya stuttered, her voice meek and small. "I.. I hurt you", she choked, sucking in a ragged breath. "I couldn't stop and-"  
Sansa cut her off with a finger against her lips. "Shh", she whispered, lightly rocking them back and forth, pulling Arya into a warm hug. She felt afraid, scared, irrational but beyond that something else simmered. Sansa was ok, she was in her arms now, safely breathing, free of tears, free of pain. It was all an illusion.  
"It was just a nightmare", Sansa whispered against Arya'a ear, making her shiver.   
"Sansa", Arya murmured, resting her chin against the girl's shoulder. It was a tentative and fluid movement, but it guarded nothing but love and devotion. "I hurt you.. and I couldn't stop.. I'm afraid.."  
Sansa shook her head. "Arya.. why? What is happening to my little sister?"  
The words struck her squarely. Sister. That was all sge was ever going to be to Sansa. Her stomach coiled in loops of adrenaline. "Its because.. of someone."  
So vague, yet so powerful. Arya saw Sansa's brain working behind her eyes, trying to decipher what it meant. "Someone?", Sansa echoed, cocking her head to the side. The mood shifted considerably just then. "Arya are you.. in love with someone?"  
Arya clenched her teeth and nodded. Her body was moving of its own accord, like a hellish self preservation. She was slowly dying with these emotions, and the only way to alleviate them was to face them. She would not be beat by fear. "Y-yes.."  
Sansa smiled encouragingly. "Oh my gods Arya!", she giggled girlishly. "But not sexually right?"  
She shook her head. "No but.. its.. I don't know."  
"I understand", Sansa grinned. She looked giddy, overjoyed and fascinated with the fact that Arya, the girl everyone took for a loveless tomboy, was actually pining after someone. It was shocking, but also comforting. She could love, and she knew it now more than ever. She was not broken, not wrong in anyway. Her heart took her places that she had no choice but to follow.  
"So, boy or girl?", it was the same conversation that she had with Jon, but Arya couldn't bring herself to say much more than a soft 'girl'.  
Sansa smirked. "Its ok Arya, but why are you so upset about it?"  
It was then that Arya remembered that sge gad told Sansa exactly what her dream entailed. If the older girl hadn't caught on by now, then she would soon. The thought that broke Arya into a thousand pieces, all scattered across her heart and warring thoughts. "Because.. it hurts.."  
Sansa suddenly grabbed Arya's chin, not hard but kindly, giving her any option to relent. But Arya didn't, allowing her eyes to lock with Sansa's. She rested her forehead against the smaller girl's, hands finding their way to Arya's back to hold her in place.  
Arya went still, frozen as their breaths mingled. She felt everything, every sudden twitch from her sister, but they were connected, and it filled her with excitement. It wanted to bubble out in spews of 'I love you' but she stilled her tongue. And waited.  
"Arya", Sansa whispered shallowly. "Please don't cry because of me.. it hurts me too."


	3. I Love You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well it is time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I was writing this and listening to Pandora, "Crazy In Love" came on.. FATE HAS SPOKEN SANSRYA

Arya froze. She felt her heart hammer then stop, almost as if it wanted her to die. Sansa knew.  
Her lips parted slightly as fear flushed her body, tingling in her veins and pricking behind her eyes. Sansa wasnt moving, just sucking in breath after breath as if her words were normal, casual. But Arya was mentally in turmoil, breathing hard as more tears came to her eyes. But her sister wasnt moving away, she wasnt running, leaving, disowning her. It was a start.  
"Sans..?", Arya whispered. She barley heard herself, but she couldnt keep the shake out of her voice. Her words were like raw ice, shivering and cracking.   
Sansa moved her head for a moment, eyes closed as she swallowed. "Am I right?"  
Arya let out a breath she didnt realize she was holding. This was it, this was the moment she would regret for the rest of her life. Why hadnt she just left it alone?! All she wanted was to be normal, and any sense of normalcy she had had was now gone, never to return. She was in love with her sister.   
"I-", her voice hitched and cut off. She couldnt formulate words, her thoughts crashing into each other like briar brambles. It hurt. Everything hurt, her chest burned and fluttered insesantly, her heart threatening to jump out of her heart.   
Sansa brought her hand up, running her fingers through Arya's hair, softly. Almost out of habit, absentminded. It scared the smaller girl and she wanted to get up and leave, but this was her room after all. And after what happened with Robb and Jon, it would be impossible to go or leave the house without a major questioning. "Shh", Sansa murmured. Arya hadnt realized when more tears poured out of her eyes, dripping down her face and onto the sheets.  
"Sansa", Arya repeated, her voice broken. "Im sorry-"  
Sansa acted quickly, tugging on Arya's hair ever so slightly and pulling their lips together. It was chaste at first, Sansa more experienced in every way. Arya felt like she was going to break down again as her lips moved, slightly sloppily but growing stronger. Sansa took her bottom lip into her mouth, biting it gently causing Arya to gasp.  
Sansa pulled away slowly, resting her forehead against Arya's and smiling. Arya's heart seemed to stop for real now, and her trembling started to turn to stone. She couldnt move, she couldnt do anything but look into her sister's eyes. "Please dont", Arya whispered. "Dont do it out of pity."  
Her sister looked momentarily off guard and hurt but it was covered quickly as she grabbed Arya's shoulders, looking down on the younger girl. "Its not out of pity", she whispered softly. "Please dont cry", she rubbed her thumb along Arya's cheeks, banishing the tears and leaving the other girl shaken and confused. She wrapped her hand around Sansa's wrist, stilling her movements.   
"What are you doing?"  
Arya's lips trembled as she spoke, still burning from their kiss.  
Sansa gently kissed Arya's forehead, then her cheek, down her jaw before finding her lips again. Arya didnt hesitate to kiss back, savoring these sweet moments, afraid if she didnt, the other girl would leave and never return. That thought alone made her afraid, afraid beyond her nightmares, beyond her forbidden thoughts.   
Arya brought up her hands to tangle in Sansa's soft hair, running her fingers through the ribbons of fire as Sansa pushed her back against the bed, looming over her. Arya's eyes widened and she broke away. It was just like her nightmares, just like what Ramsay, no, what she had done.   
"Arya", Sansa started, breathless. Her eyes glinted. "You are so beautiful", she ran her hand up Arya's cheek causing her to shiver. "You are perfect."  
"I love you", Arya murmured, holding on tight to her sister, begging her to stay as they locked eyes.  
"I love you too", Sansa smiled with such sincerity it caught the younger girl off guard. "I will always love you."  
"Even as..?"  
"Yes", Sansa said quickly, her smile never leaving her face. "Gods Arya, I love you like everyone would forbid, like the world would frown upon. But I dont care. I love you."  
"What about mother?", Arya asked, quickly and horrified. After how Catelyn had reacted to Robb and Jon, how she had been infuriated. Sansa set her jaw.  
"We'll handle it when the time comes", Sansa said softly, glancing at the door as if she was afraid her mother would walk in then and there. "But right now, you are mine."  
Arya felt momentarily uncomfortable, squirming under the cage that was Sansa's arms. She didn't want sex, and she was worried her sister would. That was the one draw back, how could Sansa love someone who couldnt even make her feel good?   
"I know", Sansa said suddenly. "I wont do anything you do want to do", she sat back, straddling the other girl's hips as she sat down. Arya's cheeks flushed, seeing her sister in such a bedraggled and raw way. it made her feel special, in some twisted emotion.   
Arya looked away, shutting her eyes. She was about to speak before Sansa placed a kiss just below her ear, trailing down her neck where she nuzzled into her sister's warmth. Her arms wound their way around the smaller girl's chest, and for once, Arya wasn't afraid.   
Arya shut her eyes, hugging Sansa tight. Thats when she remembered Ramsay existed.

The next morning, Sansa and Arya awoke quickly for school. They made haste when going down for breakfast, not wanting to seem suspicious. Though Arya was smiling a lot more than anyone had ever seen, which was worrying to a certain extent.   
Everything was fine until the doorbell rang.   
"I'll get it", Sansa said before opening the door.  
Arya sucked in a breath.  
Of course it was Ramsay fucking Bolton. He stood in the doorway wearing a shaggy black shirt full of holes and rips, mirroring the street clothes jeans that hugged his skinny thighs. Arya wanted to vomit, and seeing Sansa's expression didn't help: she was trying to force a smile, crooked and false.   
Sansa glanced back at Arya, speaking with her eyes. 'Ill figure this out', she seemed to say. Arya forced herself to remain calm, clenching her fists and looking away. She wondered home many bloody crescents would be engraved in her palms if she made that her go to habit, but she didn't care. All that mattered was smashing Ramsay's head against a wall.  
She caught Robb's look of confusion. Catelyn had finally dialed her incessant need for normalcy back, locking it away deep within herself, resorting to small grimaces and curled lips. Ned looked happier but also stiff, knowing the wrong word could set off a fiery chain reaction.  
Robb cocked his head, ushering Arya to him. The two left the room just as Sansa said her goodbyes and left with Ramsay. Arya's blood boiled as she stepped outside onto their porch, the chilled autumn air clinging to her skin. She had always loved fall, the smell, the vibrant array of colors. But most of all because of the sunsets. They were beautiful, draining the sky of color, and yet, they splashed in rays of red and orange that made her smile.  
Robb was looking at her with drawn eyebrows and a nervous smile. "You ok?"  
Arya let out a sigh. If she could talk to anyone about what had happened, it would be Robb or Jon. But in the back of her mind, she wondered if Sansa would mind. If there was indeed anything going on between them that wasn't a one-time thing. "Did Jon say anything about..?", she trailed off.  
Her brother let out a breath that ended in a chuckle. His back slumped in relief. "Kinda. He said you had a crush on someone?"  
The girl nodded, confidence brimming in her heart. She had learned that if she spoke the world seemed to be kinder, in a weird and convincing way. She didnt particularly enjoy talking about her emotions, but she also didn't despise it. She would live, and hopefully Robb would be able to sympathize. "Yeah.. well..", Arya blushed.  
He raised an eyebrow, evidently amused. "Oh gods."  
"Dont freak out, you owe me", she laughed, thinking back to a week or so ago when she had talked to Robb about him and Jon.  
Realization dawned on his face.  
"Its Sansa."  
His jaw slackened a fraction but in the end he was smirking. "Oh man, mother is going to be pissed", he laughed, smiling like a dork. She had rarley seen him like that as of late, actually happy. Actually living, living past their mother's selfish actions. "Did it.. work out?"  
Arya didn't quite know how to respond, considering Sansa had just left with her boyfriend. "Yes.. well- I think so", she blushed madly, trying to back down her emotions so they didnt clog her throat.   
"You think so?", his voice was light, the brotherly tone she had missed.  
"Yes. She- um.. Kissed me?", she said it as a question, not sure how to phrase the statement.  
Robb gaped. "Damn. Little boy crazy Sansa? I'm proud", he giggled. "And I'm happy for you."  
Arya beamed. "I think she is breaking up with Ramsay.."  
Her brother lost all sense of a smile. Not in anger, but concern. The emotion arrived so quickly her chest spiked in a similar emotion. A protective edge danced behind his eyes as he glanced to the door, as if he stared long enough he could will Sansa back. "I don't know if that's a good idea.."  
"What do you mean?"  
"His last girlfriend, she moved away from here. But I didnt know why until recently", he paused, twiddling with his thumbs. "She left because he.. well.. hurt her. I never got the specifics, but it was an abusive relationship. Bran told me about it, and he knows everything. Gossip king or whatever. I'm just worried for Sans is all. He is a dangerous person."  
Arya felt a sudden wave of urgency, feeling like a mother bear protecting her cub. If he ever dared touch Sansa she really would smash his head into a wall. "I hope she's fine, he wouldn't hurt her, right?"  
Robb didn't look so sure.

Later that night, Arya was on the phone with Gendry, talking about their math assignment. She sighed ruefully, rolling around on her bed. She hated math, and Gendry's constant bickering about certain steps and equations was driving her mad.   
It was late in the night, the moon lighting up on the horizon. Its like was shrouded by loops of heavy clouds, rolled in across the evening sky. Arya sighed. At least it was putting her mind at ease as she waited for Sansa to come home. She had seen her at school and they shared a few casual smiles, but she hadnt come home.  
Robb's words haunted her, what if Ramsay really did do something when she broke up with him? She shoved the thought away, shaking her head and groaning.  
She heard a soft click coming from downstairs before a door shut. Footsteps, light yet heavy, clomping around feigning silence. Arya brought the phone away from her ear. The sound made her think of the horror movies she used to watch, how monsters and spirits would creep down the halls, building up the tension before pouncing on their victems.   
"Ill call you back", Arya said softly before hanging up.  
Before she could get up another door slammed across the hall. So it really was Sansa.  
Arya frowned. Sansa never slammed her door, saying it was childish and wouldn't help anything. But it had to be her room, the boy's were across the house.   
She bit her lip, peeking out of her room. The hall was strangely dark. Normally her parents were up at this hour, watching a movie or a tv show. But of course they had been tired today of all days. She supposed it was lucky, she could spend more time with Sansa without fear of being found out.  
But her sister's door was shut tightly, as if locked. No sound came from inside.  
Arya's skin prickled. It really was like a horror movie. A part of her wished she had stayed on the phone with Gendry, just in case something did come out of the darkness. At least she could cry for help.  
She pressed her ear to her sister's door, thinking that she might have imagined the footsteps all together. It was quiet, very quiet. But she could hear breathing. Labored breaths.  
"Sansa?", Arya asked quietly.  
No response.  
She waited a few moments. Her ears were ringing from the lack of noise, all except the heavy breathing from beyond the door.   
Their mother had made a simple 'no locks' rule which Arya had protested, but now she was thankful. She could get into the room if she chose, and now it seemed like the only option.   
She pushed the door open, squinting in the darkness.   
Arya sucked in a breath to hold back a cry.


	4. I Will Kill Him For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just.. Ramsay is a dick. We all know it.

At first Arya didn't see anything abnormal, and her own fear was clouded with superstition and her own meager thoughts. Or maybe her eyes just wouldnt let her shielding her.   
"Sansa?", Arya asked into the darkness.  
The lights were off, no light from the clouded moon dare drip in from the window. It truly made her gut spin and contract painfully; all of it was beyond what she was conditioned to.   
There was no response, just a small shuffling. Arya could make out the faint outline of her sister, backlit by her phone which was dotted with a small blue light. But besides that, she was a mask of shadow.   
Arya flipped on the lights, closing the door so she wouldnt wake anyone else up, thats the last thing either of them needed. Before she could speak, her eyes painted a clear picture. Sansa was sitting up, arms wrapped around her torso. At first she seemed fine, she wasnt crying, or moving much at all. Like a statue. But her hair was tangled, her eyes vacant as if her mind had taken a break. Her lip was dotted with a line of blood, as if a bite, and her skin was matted in blotches. Bruises. They mirrored the ones Arya received whenever she tried to play football at school.   
Looking down, almost outside her physical body, Arya saw blood. It was caked onto Sansa's skin, sticky but dark. She felt bile rising in her throat and felt the urge to vomit. Her mind spun as she leaned against the wall. She knew what happened. How could she not? She'd seen it a dozen times, though not like this. Her dreams. They depicted exactly this, always after Ramsay. It was always him. Always Sansa.  
"Oh my gods", Arya breathed.  
Her sister barley acknowledged her, picking at a stray strand of red string from the blankets on her bed. Her movements were listless and careless as if it wasn't her at all, and a husk of a human being. She blinked lethargically, unbothered with anything except the need to die.  
Arya knew that look well, but it made her sick.  
It took a few moments for Arya to even react, slowly processing the scene before her. She could imagine every moment: Sansa breaking up with Ramsay, his anger that never seemed to have a suitable outlet. it undoubtedly came out on her, and her alone. There was no one else to shield the blow, to take the hit or the many more than came after. She was alone, and her dreams had come to fruition all because of her.   
Shaking away the tremors that raked her heart, she sped over to Sansa, reaching for a hug.  
The other girl flinched away however, looking up for the fear time. Her eyes were glossy in a sheen of fear, one so unlike Sansa Arya at first thought she was staring into her own eyes. But they were bleak, shadowed, broken.   
"Its me", Arya whispered, sitting on the bed and not even touching Sansa. It hurt, but she understood. She had seen it enough in her tv shows, in books and stories. In her own nightmares. It was all sureal, all fake in some master minded ploy. She wished more than anything to wake up from this dream, but deep down she felt how real it was. Every churn of the fan above, every buzz of the breaker box on the floor below. Every shuffle of sheets down the hall. It was real, and here they were, alone.  
Tentatively, after receiving no response, Arya reached out and layed her hand against Sansa's skin. It was hot, as if she had been out in the sun too long. But she was evidently shaking, small curls of anguish flashing through her eyes like a blaring alarm. Still, she did not cry.  
"Sansa", Arya repeated firmly, gritting her teeth. She wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around her sister and never let go, never let that damn Bolton touch her again. "Its just me.."  
Sansa turned toward her, eyes showing a slight recognition that broke Arya's heart all over again. She rubbed Sansa's arm in what she hoped was a comforting way and not a fear inducing one.  
Sansa's shoulders slacked and she heaved a sigh, choking on words that died in her throat. "Arya.. just.. please go away."  
Arya froze. That was not the reaction she was expecting. But she was stubborn, stubborn as a horse. And she knew that even if Sansa screamed, cried and thrashed she would stay. She had too. "No", she said simply, reaching down and grabbing Sansa's hand. "I wont."  
"Arya", Sansa said, except this time her words held a bite. It took all her will power not to do as she was told, just because it was her sister. Her love. But she stayed, forcing her muscles to still and calm down. "Just. Go."  
Maybe Sansa did think it was her fault. The thought made Arya fearful but she ignored the pain in her chest. These things changed people, and she was not going to abandon her now. "Im not leaving", knowing what was about to happen, Arya really did hug her sister. She wrapped her arms around the other girl's chest, holding tight.   
Sansa squirmed, pushing on Arya's shoulders, weakly trying to get her away. "Stop!", she practically screamed, but try as she might, she couldnt get away from her sister.  
And finally, after her cries to let out, she collapsed, burying her head in Arya's shoulder and hugging her tightly, breaking down in a rain of sobs. It came so suddenly that Arya was caught off guard. But Sansa cried and cried until her voice was raw and her sobs became strangled chokes she could barley utter.   
"Shhh", Arya said, running her hands down Sansa's back, gentle as ever. She had no idea how many bruises the other girl had or where, so she kept her hands soft. Sansa hiccuped and held onto Arya tighter.   
Arya rested her chin on her sister's head, staring at the wall. What could she do? They had to tell everyone, even if her sister begged to keep it a secret. But that revelation would come with the smoking gun: Why did Sansa break up with Ramsay? Would she lie? Could they even?  
She chose not to focus on that and instead decided she would live in the moment, giving no regard to what was going to happen.  
Sansa lifted her head, looking into Arya's eyes. She was weak, like a ragdoll collapsing on Arya's lap. In turn, Arya leaned back against the wall where the bed met it, trying to get them comfortable. She wouldnt call Gendry back and she wouldnt leave. She would be true to her word, just as Sansa was to hers.  
"Arya", Sansa whispered. Her voice quavered slightly, shaking like a leaf in a storm. "It- It hurts."  
"Shh", Arya said again.   
She looked back down at the blood and bit her lip. She always knew Ramsay was rough and careless, but how could so much damage come from him? The thought made her spin with regret and pure heatred, all fueled to the boy her sister once loved.   
"Hold on", Arya said, standing up.  
Sansa made a whimper of protest, sitting up and wincing, favoring her legs as she tried to get comfortable.  
Arya walked to the bathroom down the hall, shaking and bleary eyed. She whetted a rag before she came back, biting her cheek. She set to work, hearing Sansa's continued intake of breath. Bruises were everywhere along her legs, going all the way up under her skirt. Arya's gut twisted painfully. Why would anyone do this? Forget Ramsay, how could any human do this?  
The rag came away covered in blood, and Arya ended up working slowly. They didnt exchange any words, everything that could have been said lost to the mood of the room. It felt incredibly small, incredibly hot. Uncomfortable in every way possible.   
Arya tossed the rag away. It didnt look like there were any open wounds which meant..  
She shook the thought away. Not now. She couldnt think about that now; the aftermath.  
The smaller girl sat up next to Sansa, brushing a strand of hair away from her eyes. Sansa whimpered at the touch but didnt pull away. "Im so sorry", Arya said, her voice breaking.   
Sansa shook her head, pulling her knees to her chest. Arya leaned closer, running her hands along Sansa's cheeks where she noticed faint thumb marks. It was gnarled and purple, like a sunset sky, but framed by something a lot less pretty.   
The older girl sucked in a breath, her eyes wide. Arya smiled sadly, resting her forehead against Sansa's as she had done the night before. They shared a few breaths before Arya kissed her lightly, not wanting to startle or scare her. Sansa let out a relieved sigh, as if she had just come to her right state of him.   
"Its going to be ok", Arya whispered sadly. She locked eyes with Sansa and blinked away tears. She would kill Ramsay.  
"Can I go get Rob?", Arya asked tentatively.   
Sansa nodded slowly, obviously unsure of herself.  
Arya placed one last chaste kiss on her lips before slipping out of the room.

"Robb", Arya whispered urgently, rapping on his door and shuffling on her feet.  
Before long the door opened to a sleep eyed brother. His hair was a mat of tangles and knots and his eyes again presented themselves with bags. She frowned, her urgency momentarily forgotten. Any other night she would have hesitated greatly before doing this, knowing Robb needed his sleep as much as the next college student.   
"Arya?", He asked past a yawn.  
"Sansa's hurt", Arya said, not quite sure how to phrase it.  
His eyes drew together in question but he must have seen the fear in his sisters eyes because he nodded, following her back down the hallway. "What happened?"  
Arya bit her lip. "Ramsay.. he-", she broke off before gathering her thoughts. "He raped her."  
The words hung in the air, the first time she had said it and the first time he had heard. Silence enveloped them as Robb grabbed Arya's shoulder, mouth gaping. "What?"  
Arya shook her head, the tears returning. She hated seeing her brother upset, and seeing the pain and fury in his eyes sent her over the edge. They returned to Sansa's room where she had her knees tucked into her chest. A few stains of blood curdled the sheets, and the bruises were hard to see in the dark, but Robb knew instantly.  
He rushed over to his sister, taking her hand as Arya stood idly, not knowing what to do.  
So she waited, waited as Robb talked to her and smoothed her hair. She envied him for how well he could make people feel better, how kindness emanated from him and drowned out everything wrong and acrid. He was perfect, and Arya was able to do nothing. Nothing but freeze and shiver.  
Finally he stood up, his face unreadable. "Im going to get Jon", he said before leaving the room.  
Sansa shut her eyes, breathing heavily. She looked on the verge of tears again.  
She rushed over, sidling up to Sansa and pulling her in for a hug. This time, Sansa didn't hesitate to hug back, burying her head in Arya's hair. "Its all going to be ok."  
Sansa shook her head. "What if.. What if im..?", she could barley get the words out and Arya shook her head furiously.   
"Youre not", she didnt quite believe her own words though. In this god cursed world, anything could happen.  
"Arya", Sansa whispered, her eyes were lidded from exhaustion. Arya felt her gut twist at the sight. Her sister had been so innocent, so kind, and this had become of that. This putrid and aweful fate. "H-He said I would enjoy it.. that it would make me want to stay", she said. The shake was gone from her voice, replaced with a forlorn anger. "He was too strong. I should have known.. I should have ran but.. I almost believed him."  
Arya shook her head but could not bring the words up her throat.   
"Im just a stupid girl", Sansa sobbed. "Im gullible and stupid!"  
"You are not stupid", Arya said angrily, locking eyes with Sansa. "Remember the time when I went blind? I was scared of lightning for months after that, but you stayed with me every night there was a storm. When my dancing instructor had a heart attack, who was there to wipe my tears? When Nymeria bit Joffrey, you covered for me.. Lady was put down", Arya sniffed, the memories clouding her reasonable thought. Damn it if they didn't hurt. She loved Sansa too much. "Those are not the acts of a stupid girl. Those are the things a woman who cares about her family would do; You are so kind and gentle, he was a bastard to take advantage of that."  
Sansa let out a shaky sigh before snuggling into Arya's side, shutting her eyes. Her breaths became less labored, more comfortable. Dreamy. Arya hardly noticed when Jon entered the room, wild eyed and afraid. But Arya was content, stroking her sister's hair, watching her eyes flutter with dreams.  
But she couldn't shake the feeling that her nightmares had not yet been completed.


	5. It Will Be Ok

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fucking hell. Second time rewriting this crap because my backup got deleted and this text also got deleted. UGGGGGG

Sansa awoke with a start, unable to remember anything of the previous night. Perhaps it was better that way though. But soon enough it came crashing back, ruining the moments of safety she felt. Ramsay. His name dripped with malice drenched poison, sickening her and rocking her nerves. The very thought of his eyes, that freakish smile and those lust filled eyes made her squirm uncomfortably.  
Her body was weak, numbed with bruises that ran along her skin like fissures. Between her legs there was a throb, and specks of blood clinged to her legs where Arya had forgotten to clean. Arya.  
Sansa looked up, seeing the peaceful face of her sister. Her hair was strewn about her face messily, her lips mumbling in sleep, eyes fluttering with a fading dream. It made Sansa's heart contract. Arya was beautiful, yes, but she was also hers. It filled her with joy and hope, but the moment was fleeting. She knew her family would need to talk, all of them, to come to an end. This morning was the last morning of secrecy her and Arya had, and it had also been their near first. Sansa shut her eyes, hoping sleep would claim her again.  
Sun wound its way through the windows like uncut vines, dripping down in pools across the carpet and window seal. The air was cast in streaks of dust, but it was cozy, warm and comfortable. She never wanted to leave, never wanted to move, because if she did, she may never have a moment like this again.  
She thought back to the day in the hall where her and Arya had talked about Jon adn Robb, how she had pretended to be baffled at the incest, the strangeness of it. But how could she, when her perfect sister was with her? How could she do anything but lie and hide it?  
She bit her lip, tasting caked on blood. Ramsay had bitten her multiple times in his ectasy, and she knew there would be fissures along her neck and chest. She forced the thought away, instead looking around the room.  
Jon's scruffy hair poked up from the side of the bed, rising and falling softly in a tangle of curls. It was the same color as his Night's Watch T-Shirt. It made her smile slightly, remembering the loud blaring noise that always came from her half-brother's room, the same songs over and over until she was far since sick of them. But it was normal, comfortable. Looking down, she saw Robb curled at his side, resting his head on the other man's chest.  
Her eyes drifted back to Arya. She wanted Arya to hug her close and never let go, just like them. So she wrapped her arms around Arya torso and felt her sister stiffen and wake. She looked down at Sansa with confusion, realization then concern. "Sansa?", she whispered. The sound was foreign on her lips, Arya was never that gentle, even when she tried to be. She was stoic and broad, bold even. It made Sansa a mix of happy and sad, knowing she had inextricably changed the younger girl.  
But then again, she had changed herself.  
Silently, she vowed to never let anyone touch her again, regardless of who. Arya wasnt interested in sex, so that shouldnt be a problem, right?  
"Hey", Sansa whispered, sitting up straighter and wincing. Her bones were brittle, her muscles clenching painfully as her skin shifted. Everything her and her head spun. She winced, nearly falling over before Arya pulled her into a loving embrace.  
Sansa melted immediately, hiding her face in Arya's hair. "Feeling better?", Arya asked uncertaintly, though her hands went up to Sansa's hair where she ran them through like spun bronze.  
The older girl couldnt exactly say yes, the painful memories shooting into her vision like sparks. They danced behind her thoughts, taunting. She wanted to look.. it was a sickness, but she knew she would regret it if she did. "Y-yes."  
Arya shook her head. "Im sorry it had to be him."  
"Doesnt matter", Sansa muttered. "I never want that again."  
She could feel Arya intake a shrill breath but let it go. It was her choice, she knew she could never do this again. Arya was perfect for her after all. They stared at eachother for a moment before Arya pressed her lips gingerly to Sansa's cheek.  
The feeling should have caused her to shy away, but she didnt.  
Just then, Jon stirred, yawning loudly and stiffy sitting up. "Sansa!", he said rather loudly. Robb groaned at his side, rubbing his already tired looking eyes. "How are you feeling?"  
"Im fine", Sansa said. She couldnt keep the bite out of her voice, but Jon didnt seem to mind, if anything he looked as if he understood. "Are you ready to.. tell mom?", the last part was finished as more of an afterthought, as if he himself were scared more than her.  
Sansa didnt react but felt Arya's arms tighten around her. "We'll see", the younger girl muttered. "But I swear-"  
"If you swear your going to kill another person I'll have to put a restraining order on the world", Robb smirked, trying to lighten the mood.  
No one laughed, but Sansa did smile. 

Arya helped Sansa up to her unsteady feet as Robb and Jon snuck back to their rooms, hoping to not be caught by their mother.  
Sansa yelped and nearly tumbled to the ground, leaving the considerably smaller girl to catch her. Arya sucked in a breath as Sansa leaned against her heavily, her legs shaking and thighs aching. Again, everything hurt. She resisted the urge to collapse to the ground and simply sleep.  
"Youre ok", Arya whispered in her ear.  
The act spurred Sansa forward as they made their way to where the bathroom was. Arya hadnt realized that Sansa had yet to see herself, and when she did, she let out a long and horrid breath.  
She looked younger, afraid like a small child. Her lips were bloodied at the side, and all down her neck and to her collarbone there were blotches of bruises, color erupting under her skin. She winced, her hair now a matted tangle and her eyes vacant, laced in the aftereffects of the threat concluded.  
Arya wrapped her arms around Sansa's waist, leaning in to peck her on the neck. "You are beautiful", Arya whispered, leaning into her sister and smiling softly.  
Sansa smiled in return, her chest bubbling with love. "They are going to know what happened the minute I walk downstairs."  
Arya pursed her lips and olnly held her tighter. "Maybe, but if they do, then we tell them. I love you, and regardless of what happens, that wont change. I promise."  
The words filled Sansa's heart with joy and she giggled slightly, smiling and turning to Arya, hugging her tightly before they got to work on trying to make her less like a thrown away paint pallet. 

As Arya and Sansa walked down the stairs, Sansa with more care and a few cringes, walking bow legged, they were caight with numerous stares. Catelyn in particular.  
Rickon and bran looked to have been in the middle of an arguement but looked up when their sisters entered. Robb and Jon were sitting together, hands clasped tensely under the table. Theon and Ned were talking but looked up.  
They had to know.  
Sansa's mind spun, and if not for Arya reassuring hand clutching her own, she surely would have fallen and passed out.  
After many hugs from her mother, Sansa was finally allowed to sit down. "What happened?", Ned demanded, looking stern as he leaned over and clasped his grizzled hands.  
Arya cut in, taking the reins, no one looked surprised by this, only grateful. "Ramsay, he.. well.. he..", she looked for te right words but Sansa only nodded. "He raped her. She broke up with him and-"  
Ned clenched his fists, jaw pulled taught like a bow string. "I will kill that bastard", he swore.  
Sansa looked down at her hands, covered in small cuts and bruises. "Im sorry", she whispered.  
Arya wrapped her arm around her, squeezing her in assurance. "Why did you break up with him?", little Rickon asked, confused by the whole ordeal.  
The older girl bit her lip, watching the stern gazes of her family. Jon bit back a cough of dismay as Robb looked down at his hands. She took a deep breath. "Because I fell for someone else."  
Catelyn locked gazes with her eldest daughter. "And who would that be?", her voice was accusing, but also sympathetic. Sansa could tell she was just stressed and out of her comfort zone.  
Sansa was silent for a long time. Could she lie? No. She couldn't. That would only cause more problems later on. "I-", she bit back another sob but felt Arya lean in and lightly kiss her cheek.  
The move was bold and took everyone by surprised, but Sansa let out a breath of relief. "Me", Arya said simply.


End file.
